Dark Eyes, Split Lip
by 9burials
Summary: Transparent hands around my neck, but I love the way you let me breathe instead... Hinata wears his emotions on his sleeve. Kageyama wonders how he let this go on for so long. KageHina, mentions of molestation and suicide attempt. One-shot.


**I think this is a one-shot, maybe a second chapter, but no more!**

 **Warning(s): mention of mental illness, sexual abuse, boy x boy**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyuu! or St. Patrick by PVRIS (summary). The excerpts at the beginning and the end are from my poetry.**

 **Pairing: KageHina**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

 _I'm ripping through your skin_  
 _With my nails this time around_  
 _And I'm sorry, I didn't know you were so hollow_

* * *

Hinata smiled at everyone that passed by him, his embers full of false eagerness and his movement nothing short of sluggish. He silently wondered what his bedhead looked like, subconsciously running a hand through his disheveled hair. He'd rushed out of his house this morning after doing his younger sister's hair and sending her off to school, and work last night hadn't exactly been fun.

Hinata walked towards his last class, math being the last thing on his mind.

He had work after school, but he'd have to call in a little late. First, he had to make sure his younger sister got to Karasuno, then it was practice then work. Shouyou was lucky that their aunt picked her up (although sometimes she wouldn't bring Natsu back). The spiker didn't like his aunt or _her_ side of the family too much, but Natsu was safe and happy to see them, so it was fine with him.

"Hinata-san!" he heard.

Shouyou's head snapped towards his teacher who had apparently caught him spacing out _again_. It was an ordinary occurrence now. Every other day he'd fall asleep in class, or his vision would be a little unfocused. Hinata didn't even know when he got to class.

Just like always, he sighed and apologized. And just like always, the teacher let it slide.

Hinata had other things to worry about.

* * *

"Hey, idiot! Try not hitting my head with the ball!" Tobio growled.

Hinata flinched away before smiling. "S-Sorry, Kage-"

"Honestly, can't you do anything right?" Tsukkishima said loud enough for the spiker to hear. "All you ever seem to do is fail-"

"Shut up," the boy mumbled under his breath.

"-And you can't seem to make higher than D in your best classes," he continued.

"Tsukki!" Yamaguchi exclaimed.

"I bet your mother's ashamed of you-"

"I said shut up!"

The outburst didn't go unnoticed by the rest of the team. The third-years turned around to find Shouyou with his fists balled and his head low, panting, red staining his cheeks from anger no doubt. His entire being was seeping with anger. Tsukkishima flinched away and held his arm up to shield himself from whatever attack the ginger would plant on him.

 _"Hinata!"_

* * *

There were days when the ultimate decoy talked his ears off. Hinata made everyone laugh and practice went as expected, with insignificant, humorous moments between the smallest crow and Tsukkishima. The two were practically at each other's throats, but not as much as the setter and spiker were. It was comical, everyone could breathe.

But, today was _oh-so-different_.

Tobio found himself craving that _annoyingly_ loud voice of his and the shine in his chestnut brown eyes whenever he spiked the ball in the desired direction. Hinata had improved over these past few months, and Tobio was proud of him (not that he'd ever admit it). But, as his volleyball skills got better, everything else got worse. There was a point where he didn't even show up for practice and that raised a red flag for everyone. As per usual, he just recited some poor excuse along the lines of "I took up some after school lessons for a few classes!" or the infamous "It's nothing for you guys to worry about!" It seemed that no matter what the lie was, it ended in a nervous laugh and Hinata asking his partner to set to him.

Otherwise he was normal, a little tense, but as close to normal for Hinata. The ginger returned to practice a few weeks ago with the same bright smile, despite his eyes looking a few shades darker. He was still loud and annoying and everything in between, but he wasn't _his_ Hinata. His mood had gotten progressively worse over the months, but he ignored it. It was well hidden at first, but even that didn't last too long.

"I said shut up!"

Kageyama wasn't easily surprised or scared. But, he was frightened for Tsukkishima.

Tsukkishima was not his friend. He was a grinch, the sign of headaches to come, more-so than Shouyou. The gleam of his glasses blinded Kageyama to the point he flinched whenever he saw blonde hair.

Yachi thought he didn't like her. Tsukki only smirked.

No, Tsukki was not nice in any aspect of the word, but the look of fear in his eyes when Hinata jumped on him made a shiver run down his spine and the hair on the back of his neck stand on end.

' _Who are you?'_

Tobio watched as Daichi, Asahi, and Tanaka all tried to pry Hinata off the blonde. He faintly heard Nishinoya trying to calm the ginger down from his rampage and Kiyoko trying to calm Yachi down from a bubbling anxiety attack

His pupils looked like they turned to slits, but the setter wasn't surprised or upset about that.

Hinata was crying the entire time.

Salty tears ran down his face and he didn't seem to notice or care. He was just so _pissed_. When he calmed down enough to realize that everyone was looking, he ran. Tobio didn't go after him, not until much later. Another mistake.

* * *

Hinata did not take to kindly to being stared at.

Despite his flamboyant nature, and the craving to be the center of attention, the second any set of calculation eyes were looking at his skin he had the urge to crawl out of it. Being looked at had always been a fear for Shouyou, but it had never been so crippling as it had been after he attacked Tsukki.

Looked over to his right and on the floor sat Kei with Yamaguchi hovering over him like a mother hen and Asahi trying desperately not to look at all the blood coming from his nose, some of his skin looked like it was turning blue.

His eyes quickly shifted to the group of people before him, tears pricking at his eyes as soon as he saw theirs. His legs became weak and quivered under the weight of his nervousness.

Daichi didn't look angry, so he thought that must be a good sign, but the worried and _fearful?_ look coming from Suga made his heart clench, but…

Tobio was just _standing there_ like a puppet as if he didn't even care that they were looking at him in such a way. Kageyama's eyes had been dead set on Hinata's, a haunted and hollow look on his face that screamed _who are you?_

"D-Don't look at me like that," he mumbled helplessly, tears threatening to flood over.

"Hinata," Sugawara tried to say in a soothing, motherly tone.

"I said don't look at me like that!"

With that, Hinata took off, his backpack over his shoulder, his shaking legs taking him from the gym and the cold silence. The wind blew against his face, the chill in the air causing his face to go numb, tears still flowing freely from dark eyes.

He looked down at the ground as he quickly ran through the public, dodging at the slightest glimpse of a pair of running shoes, or the _cling_ of a bike.

He rounded a small corner and pulled out his cellphone. He dialed the number, clearing his throat after the fourth ring.

"Hello?"

An annoyed sigh could be heard on the other end. " _What is it now, Shouyou?"_ a feminine voice asked.

Despite the condescending tone, he smiled and forced a joyful voice. "H-Hey, aunt Kani, I was wondering if you could-"

" _I already have her, she'll be staying here,"_ the woman said shortly.

"Oh, what time should I-"

" _We've been over this, boy."_

Hinata's (forced) bright smile fell and he bit into his lip, drawing blood. "Y-Yes, Kani-san."

The line went dead and he dropped his phone onto the concrete ground, his hand shaking in the cold. He flinched at the cold droplet of rain that fell. He smiled, his eyes covered by wet hair and tears.

"So, you really are going to take Natsu away from me, aren't you?" he asked to the open sky. "She doesn't need a sinner for a brother, does she?"

It only rained harder, a crack of thunder resounding in his ears. He laughed.

"Strike me down then," he mumbled. "Hell, I'll do it for you."

The rain only fell harder, soaking his white, forcing the t-shirt to cling to his small body. The ginger ignored it and walked slowly back to his home, an idea going through his head, about to be set in stone.

* * *

Kageyama didn't know what to do. His head spun several ideas wrapped around his head, but not one made it past his lips, and not one foot had moved from the spot where he saw Hinata run out of the gymnasium. Daichi and the others huddled together, spouting ideas as to how to get Hinata, _their_ Hinata back on the court and ready to go. Tsukki had been taken to the back with Kiyoko and Yamaguchi, Yachi had to call a friend for a ride home.

"He'd been acting weird," she said not long before she left. "He didn't talk as much in history anymore, and when I asked him about it he just kinda…"

"Blew you off," Tobio mumbled to himself.

Hitoka looked down at her feet, a wave of shame nearly consuming her. "He promised me he'd tell me later," she paused and looked off to the side, "I've never seen him so upset before," the blonde girl mumbled, more-so to herself than anyone else.

The setter looked at her with narrowed blue eyes before speaking. "He never got back to you?"

Hinata Shouyou was not one to break promises, no matter who this new character was, Shouyou would never do that. Not to Yachi.

"I mean, a few weeks back, he said his mom took away his cellphone over something stupid. Then he...h-he just…"

Kageyama grew nervous, he wasn't the type to be dealing with crying girls. Although, Suga had gotten her to realize that Kageyama didn't hate her, it was just his face.

The raven would ask him later.

"Y-Yachi…"

"Hinata said we couldn't be f-friends anymore."

That shook him.

If there was anything Kageyama Tobio was willing to admit, it was the fact that Hinata Shouyou was an _idiot_. His deep caramel eyes were always confused, especially at the simplest of things, and his best subject was (surprisingly) math. The decoy often tutored Kags in it, but would fail the test. He missed school at least three times every four or five weeks and was too tired to come up with a decent lie.

"That idiot didn't mean it, I promise."

Of course, Tobio was an idiot, too, and ran in the general direction he'd seen Hinata go in, a glare set etched into his face, one that could kill.

' _Why didn't you just ask for help?'_

* * *

Kageyama swore he was going to be arrested within the next twenty minutes. His hands clammed up as he held his phone tighter and tighter, waiting for Hinata's mother to answer her phone, considering Shouyou didn't answer. The raven nearly through his phone against the brick wall across the street. With hair as bright as Hinata's, he didn't think it'd be so hard to find him?

' _I swear if you're in this rain...'_ he thought angrily to himself.

He walked up to the front gates of Hinata's Bakery and found it to be locked. Climbing the fence, he made his way through the back of the bakery, ignoring the delicious smell of bread and cookies that Hinata's mother baked.

"Hinata-san?" he called out. A moment of silence passed before he called out again, still no answer from his friend's mother. "Do ghosts live here or something?" he grumbled towards himself.

It wasn't until then he heard soft sobbing coming from upstairs. Kageyama shook in his sneakers before (slowly) heading up the stairs to the actual house part of the store. Once there, the source of the crying became clear, albeit Tobio wasn't sure if he'd rather seen a ghost.

There in the center of the living stood a shaking, wet Hinata, a firearm in his hands, pointed towards his own head.

' _Oh, God, no.'_

"Kageyama, w-what?" Hinata asked, his eyes wide like a deer in the headlights.

' _Awaiting death.'_

"P-Put the gun down, _Hinata_ ," his name rolled off his lips in a stuttering, cracking voice. It wasn't like him at all.

Shouyou breathed heavily, his heart beating faster as the clock on the wall ticked away. He felt like a timb bomb.

The setter walked closer to Hinata, the ginger's finger squeezing a little more around the trigger. But, as soon as Kageyama's arms wrapped around him, he froze.

"Whatever it is, it's okay…" he whispered, closing his arms around him awkwardly before dragging him to the couch.

Kageyama held his volleyball partner close to him, the smaller boy's back to his chest and arms wrapped around a firm stomach. It had been a rough day for him to say the least. The King hadn't expected Shouyou to react so violently to Tsukkishima's daily verbal bickering, it was unlike him. He didn't know what was going on with his best friend, and he didn't like in the least. Something had been bothering the boy. It was on the tip of Kageyama's tongue. He just needed a hint, a look, a clue, anything that could allow him to help Shouyou.

But, frankly, Hinata didn't want to talk about it.

"Let's get into some dry clothes."

The ginger nodded and walked into the back room, turning the light on. He handed his best friend a towel and some clothes from the last time he'd spent the night.

"You mom won't get mad that we're ruining he floor, will she?" he laughed awkwardly.

Shouyou froze. "Y-You shouldn't really be here, but, no, I don't think she will."

Tobio ignored the first part and threw on an old black t-shirt and a pair of shorts and watched as Hinata did the same. He felt a small blush rise to his cheeks before he decided to look away (only because he got caught looking).

' _Please don't look at me with those hungry eyes that she had…'_

As soon as he'd finished dressing, the raven pulled him into a tight hug and dragged him over to the bed, his back on the headboard, Hinata's on his chest.

It hadn't been the first time that Hinata had an outburst. This had been happening more and more. No one noticed that Hinata just kept spiraling out of control until today. He always had a smile despite the force he put behind it and the violence he held in his eyes.

He was acting his usual self, at least he tried to. He smiled, but his shoulders were tense and his eyes were nervous. _God_ , Tobio should've seen it _sooner_. He should've seen it before anyone got hurt.

Hinata was shaking now, he was so angry at the world. It hadn't been fair, and it wasn't fair for Tsukki either. Tsukki was a prick, there was no question about it, but he didn't deserve _that_ all because he upset the decoy one too many times. Did he?

Maybe he did.

"He deserved it," Shouyou whispered. "He was..."

"He had it coming, but did you really have to-" Kageyama stated before he was interrupted by the shorter teen.

"That idiot said something he shouldn't have," the ginger muttered more so to himself than to the setter. Hinata frowned, and while Tobio couldn't see it, he already knew he never wanted to even _think_ about anything other than a smile on the tan face.

"Hey, what's wrong, idiot?" the raven asked out softly. It was a strange feeling, to call out to his best friend in such a way. He wasn't soft, he wasn't loving he was...insultingly loving? He'd come up with a term for it later. Kageyama wondered when 'idiot' had become a term of endearment for the boy in his arms.

A pregnant silence still stretched between them. The king thought his decoy didn't hear him, so he prodded once more.

"I said what's wrong-"

"They're gonna take her away from me."

 _'Her?'_

"He said she was ashamed of me."

Kageyama frowned and nudged Hinata with his head. "I only spoke to your mother a few times, but I think she's proud of you, idiot."

He used that soft loving tone again, Hinata found comfort in it, despite the insult that came afterwards.

"How do you know that?" The question left his lips before he could even stop them.

"She's your mother."

"She was nothing of the sort."

Tobio furrowed his eyebrows in thought. Did he have a bad relationship with her? The setter wasn't close to his mom, but close enough to love her, to accept her love, and to accept her help. But, the energy radiating off the boy's body was not love.

"You know she blamed me for everything bad in her life. Anything that went wrong, it was because of me. Even in death, I wasn't enough for her," Shouyou shouted his last sentence as tears ran down his face and onto his clenched fists. His voice sounded worn and hoarse, so unlike him. It wasn't Hinata.

His ebony-haired partner didn't say anything, so he continued without a care in the world. "She had cancer, can you believe it, Kageyama? She didn't look sick at all did she?" He continued, a sad, defeated chuckle escaping his thin lips.

Kageyama said nothing, simply, because his friend was right. He couldn't tell the woman was sick when he'd met her. She had long dark hair that went all the down to her waist and wore a white apron around her body, covering the army green pants and navy blue shirt. Her ravenous hair was tied back into a neat French braid. The woman ran a small bakery in the middle of town that got a good amount of business. She made a mean pumpkin pie in October.

That's how Tobio remembered Hinata's mother. As a proper mother. She seemed kind enough and offered the crow to take home a dozen or so cookies. He, of course, denied her before she insisted again and again, adding more and more cookies each time. She seemed extremely tired, but generous all the same. Reminded him of his own mother.

"I knew something was wrong, but never said anything. I didn't care either way. She didn't care about me. So why should I...?"

The King only held to his partner tighter and buried his face a on the other's neck. He stayed quiet.

"She wasn't a good mother. She was an evil whore that wanted to see me suffer, but she needed me. I needed her and she _knew_ it."

He was shaking again. Shouyou knew he looked weak, his voice was cracking with emotion and he wished that someone else had gone after him. He wished no one had gone after him.

"I was happy, you know? I was happy she died. I was glad she suffered as long as she did, and I was glad that I could be free. I wanted to jump for joy, I wanted to dance on _her grave_. But, you know what I did?"

Tobio didn't try to reply, he only held the boy tighter out of fear he'd do something ridiculous. It's not like he hadn't already tried. Shouyou was hysterical, he knew.

"I cried. I cried for that evil woman that made me do disgusting things. She always talked about how I looked like my father and touch my chest. And she just kept going lower and lower..." he said sobbing.

"That's enough, Shouyou, it's okay."

Hinata turned himself over so that hood has lay in the crook of Kageyama's neck. Years of pain and suffering poured down his round face and onto the crow's grey T-shirt. Tobio didn't care. He would've held him tighter if he could.

"Natsu was so _sad_. I think that's when it hit me that someone held compassion for her. She clung to me and I was afraid. I was so fucking scared. And now they're taking her away..."

The king didn't hesitate to push the boy's orange hair back to kiss the tan forehead before kissing his lips. Tobio didn't know what he was doing. It felt like a dream, a long, electrifying dream. And Hinata didn't seem to mind the kiss too much either. He cried to his heart's content.

"I just want this to be _over_ ," he sobbed openly into the t-shirt.

"We'll figure something out. I promise."

Shouyou only nodded before laying his head into his chest and falling asleep, Tobio not long after.

* * *

 _I found bullet holes going through your soul_  
 _So many gaping holes, stars so far apart, and we put them together_

 _Not knowing what they truly are_

* * *

 **First Haikyuu! story! Tell me what you think! With enough reviews I might make this a two-shot.**

 **Review! Review!**

 **Thanks!**


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